It's not necessary to believe in God to be a good person.
In a way, the traditional notion of God is outdated.
One can be spiritual, but not religious.
It is not necessary to go to church and give money.
For many, nature can be a church.
Some of the best people in history did not believe in God,
while some of the worst deeds were done in his name.
--POPE FRANCIS
From Steve Berry's The Malta Exchange
I am realizing that, after a busyness-filled marriage, child-rearing, and career-occupied life, I now live in retirement, not immobility or non-thinking or non-interest or non-health, but with a lively, active, healthy, interesting lifestyle, during which I have time and energy to pursue varied interests and endeavors with some semblance of almost complete leisure. I can spend a whole day in my PJs reading the myriad of tomes that festoon my tabletops and bookshelves if I choose. I can dedicate a whole day, or days, to writing short stories about the things that have captured my interest throughout my life: ancestry, siblings, children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, career, pets, experiences, adventures, education, . . .
I can get up as early as I desire knowing I can retire a little earlier tonight to honor my quest to get enough sleep, simply to enjoy welcoming a beautiful (or rainy, stormy, devilishly hot) new day--without having to go anywhere other than the bathroom, kitchen, and walks with Lacy, or having to do anything other than the activities of daily living that ensure health and well-being.
In retirement I have LESS stuff but MORE satisfaction with life. Managing other people's lives is not my job anymore. I'm here to offer my opinions, when asked, offer support, when it's necessary or asked for, pray for a Higher Power to guide those I love, and especially those I do not love.
This holiday season, I'm vested in pursuing serenity, as the Serenity Prayer says:
God, grant me the Serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
The Courage
to change the things I can, and
the Wisdom
to know the difference.
Last Monday, one week ago today, I lost my keyring that held ALL my keys--house, programmed car key, mailbox key, and key for access to community center for workout room and package pickup. However, I didn't realize they were not in the one place, next to the front door, where I normally, and should always, keep them, until Tuesday morning, many hours having passed with much incumbent forgetfulness accompanying the time lapse.
I immediately set about 'looking everywhere' for the missing openers. "What did I wear yesterday morning? Where did I go? When was the last time I used them?" And I checked waste paper baskets, drawers, cupboards, shelves, bed, chairs, closets, pockets. You name it, I looked there!
I live in a two-bedroom apartment; it's not a mansion. There's only one entry from without, save for a second story deck that can only be accessed from within the abode. I checked all outdoor and indoor plants, moving leaves to visualize around the base of each potted plant, etc., etc., etc.
Tuesday passed into Wednesday, which arrived after a night of tossing, turning, and dreaming of lost keys. As time passed my memory of activities of 'days ago' became less crisp, cloudier. Though I felt they had to be nearby, I was reminded that there's always the possibility of having 'accidentally' thrown them away with refuse into one of the huge garbage bins provided by management across the drive in front of my building.
I began asking neighbors if they'd seen any keys on walkways, management if any lost keys had been turned in. My locked car in the carport was a likely suspect, though I hesitated to call AAA for two reasons; first, because I have a checkered reputation for locking keys in my car and even AAA will get tired of my absentmindedness, and, second, because I was confident that I'd used the keys to access the mailbox after the last time I'd used the car. I even Googled FINDING LOST KEYS and followed the suggestions of the World Wide Web, once again, sometimes for the fourth or fifth time, checked pockets, inside the dryer, took drawers apart once again, etc.
By Wednesday, though I'd prayed for clarity, I'd not actually asked Saint Anthony, the patron saint of lost items, for his intercession. (Whether one believes or not, this mindful meditation does usually bring about thoughts and ideas I'd not, to this point, been aware of). Oh, and friends, relatives, and neighbors, as they listened to my lamentations, offered their own fool-proof tools for finding lost valuables. A childish wish not to bother God or Saint Anthony (my neighbor Suzann has suggested I call him Tony!), I limited myself to praying only that I become enlightened, accepting suggestions from everywhere.
On Wednesday I began contacting locksmiths and the Toyota dealership's service department to learn that replacement for the programmable key to my 2009 Toyota Scion would cost over $400! Yikes, just having returned from a month in Europe a little over a week before this calamity, I am conscientiously watching my pennies in order to refill the coffers for a new adventure, whatever it may be--but not to buy one car key! I had a spare house key and the apartment management can replace lost keys for a price, about $50 each, another $100!
I was exasperated, to say the least as I'd had to ask for assistance to fulfill various commitments, rides, groceries, deliveries; I consider myself an independent soul, unused to begging help in my activities of daily living. It was becoming evident that I'd have to reconcile this miasma of negativity soon; this couldn't go on indefinitely.
Oh, but I just didn't want to admit defeat, though I was simultaneously chastising myself again and again for almost everything I could think of. How could I have come to this place of misery and helplessness? Thursday and Friday I took to prayer, not actually asking that I find those keys, but that I at least locate the spare valet key that should have been in its accustomed location in the kitchen 'junk drawer,' but wasn't!
Friday evening, as I was attempting to fall into the now accustomed tossing and turning slumber, I decided that I'd not do anything drastically expensive over the weekend but that, on Monday morning, I'd call the Toyota Service Department, order a replacement key, then, when it arrived, I'd have the car towed to the dealership where the new key would be 'programmed,' most likely leaving me without a car for a week, or more, more!
Saturday morning, after a fitful night, but more rested than I'd been in days, though resigned to my fate, I did get myself up and completely tore apart all kitchen, bathroom, and furniture drawers once again, this time actually cleaning the dusty bottoms with a sponge and rearranging and throwing away excess. [Resolution: I'm going to maintain neatness more successfully in the future!] That took up hours, during which time I found things I didn't even know were missing! All closets, cupboards, drawers, shelves, boxes, furniture, et al are in pristine order as I write!
Into the afternoon I worked, during which time I simultaneously asked my Higher Power to enlighten me in what's really important in this life of mine. One more pass through the bin I keep on the top shelf of my bedroom closet, a convenient plastic storage container chock full of those niggling accessories the traveler has need of while adventuring around the world. I'd perused its contents several times during the week, even though I'd diligently deposited the valued travel accoutrements right after I'd returned from my latest adventure, now almost two weeks ago.
As I reached above my head to bring the bin down from on high, the fanny pack that I love to use for traveling slid off the top of the overstuffed receptacle; reaching down to pick it up off the floor I grabbed it in such a way that I noticed there was a bulge deep in the belly of the largest of the small sections of the black bag. Had I used the fanny pack since I'd been home? I didn't have any recollection of having done so.
I dropped it on the bed to inspect contents; there, lying peacefully in the fanny pack was my key ring, all four keys and my Weight Watchers Lifetime Member charm there resting as if nothing of note had transpired in this house these last SIX DAYS! Falling to my knees I thanked God, Saint Anthony, the powers that be for the rediscovery of those necessities of life in this day and age.
Journal post Saturday evening:
FOUND MY KEYS - lessons learned:
* Look to God but pray only for His will, not mine
* Be persistent
* Be patient
* Look for alternatives
* Google search informs that los items are most often found within a couple of feet of where they belong, or were lat used
* Accept suggestions from others
* Plan behavior modification - and follow through with it!
* Make more spares - and insure that it will be possible to access them!
* Make meditation a component of daily life
* BE GRATEFUL!
PS: Kari and David were kind, loving, and helpful, not only with suggestions and questions for me to contemplate, but by actually coming over and participating in the search. Thank You God for my daughter and son-in-law!
PPS: David and Kari treated me to dinner at Fat's Sunday evening, a celebration of lost keys, Christmas treat, and farewell after their extended El Dorado Hills visit from Arizona. After a delicious dinner we headed to Best Buy where they bought me an early Christmas gift: an Apple Air Tag key chain. I am so grateful. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
'Tis the season to begin thinking of New Year's Resolutions, well, soon it will be.
I'm unaware of when this was written, as Thomas Merton died in 1968, but these words of wisdom continue to resonate today:
From Come Into the Silence by Thomas Merton:
If I were to make any resolutions, it would be
the same old ones--
no need to make them--it doesn't take much concentration
to see how I keep them. I struggle along.
It's useless to break your head over the same
old details week after week
and year after year, pruning the same ten
twigs off the top of the tree.
Get at the root . . .
In Thomas Friedman's insightful book, The World is Flat written way back in 2005 with updates in 2006 and 2007, I found these Albert Einstein words of wisdom:
"Out of clutter, find simplicity.
Out of discord, find harmony.
In the middle of difficulty, lies opportunity."
and
"Imagination is more important than knowledge."
Oh, so true!